The way Taiga worked had always been described by one word: alone.
He wasn't the type of person who'd hate other people, nothing like that. He just didn't like depending on them, especially on strangers, and especially when it came to art as dear to him as photography. Even before becoming a freelance professional and making a living out of it, photography had always been more than just a hobby for him. It was an extension of his world, a way to capture something only he could see. Only he knew exactly how he wanted things to look. And besides, he needed extreme peace to find the perfect shot without anyone fussing around or getting in his way.
Simply put, Taiga didn't want or need anyone beside him.
So when Kochi, the producer of the upcoming exhibition, announced that he had hired an assistant for him, Taiga couldn't believe he had heard it right.
"You're joking," Taiga deadpanned after Kochi broke the news to him one morning when he had come to the studio to discuss the details for the exhibition.
Kochi barely spared him a glance as he scrolled through emails on his phone.
"Nope," he said, raising his shoulders in that way he always did when he was serious but didn't want to argue about it.
Taiga scowled. "I don't need an assistant."
"Well, it doesn't matter if you need one or not. Since you've got one now anyway."
Kochi's smugness was infuriating. Taiga had worked with him on multiple projects, and their workflow had always been smooth. They barely needed to talk through the details because Kochi handled logistics, funding, and all the official nonsense, while Taiga took care of the creative side. That was how it worked. That was how it had always worked.
Until now.
This was the first time Kochi had ever suggested, let alone forced, an assistant on him.
Taiga frowned. "But why?"
"But why what?"
"Why do I suddenly need an assistant? I've done every exhibition for you without one, and they've been successful."
"Because you're overworked, Mr. Great Artist," Kochi said with a grin.
Taiga scoffed. "Bullshit. Tell me the truth."
Kochi finally put his phone down. He rubbed the back of his neck before straightening his back and pulling a more serious look on his face. "Fine. If you really want to know, it's not just about you. It's about funding."
Taiga frowned. "What?" he asked.
Kochi gestured toward the ceiling like he was motioning to some invisible higher-ups there. "Well, we got a great sponsorship deal for this exhibition, but one of the conditions was to take on a trainee. You've surely heard about these deals. This time it's some internship program, a way to 'support young creatives', and stuff like that. But in short, it means more funding for us and a little experience for them, so I guess everyone wins in the end."
"Except me," Taiga commented dryly.
Kochi grinned. "Oh, come on, martyr. It's one assistant. Who's supposed to help you with your work, not to make it more difficult. What's the worst that could happen?"
Taiga didn't bother responding.
Kochi nodded as if he was saying there you go.
"Anyway," he continued. "I don't have time to argue about this one with you. You're handling a ton of work for this exhibition, so little help won't kill you. And since this person has already been hired as a trainee, you should use him as you see fit."
"Use him?"
"Yeah. Give him something useful to do."
"That's not an answer," Taiga muttered.
"Figure it out yourselves," Kochi said. He stood up from his seat, and as he passed by Taiga, he clapped him on his back so hard that he almost knocked him forward. "Anyway, I'm late for a meeting. Play nice."
When Taiga walked outside the building, he still felt slightly annoyed because he had lost the argument with Kochi.
And now he had an assistant.
Some random guy he was supposed to "use" however he wanted.
He let out a long sigh.
He sincerely hoped this project wasn't going to be a disaster.
-----
The next afternoon, Taiga sat outside a small café. He had occupied one table from the terrace and held a phone in hand, staring at the last text message he had sent to a phone number he had gotten from Kochi.
You:
Let's meet at two. The Mori Café on the corner of the entrance to the Meiji Shrine. You know it?
The reply had come quickly.
Matsumura Hokuto:
Yes.
That was it. No follow-up, no confirmation, not even a thumbs-up emoji. Taiga had already feared this whole assistant thing to be painfully awkward. Still, he hadn't expected the awkwardness to start before they even met.
Taiga sighed and slid his phone into his pocket. It was almost two already, but then he finally spotted someone approaching him.
The man walking toward him was—well, there was no mistaking that this was Matsumura Hokuto. Kochi had described his fashion style as "interesting", but Taiga hadn't quite caught what that had meant. Now he surely did.
Hokuto was wearing possibly the strangest sweater Taiga had ever seen. It was oversized and loosely knit, with uneven holes scattered across the fabric like it had been attacked by moths or designed by someone with a personal vendetta against intact clothes. The weird sweater was combined with wide-legged beige pants paired with scuffed-up sneakers. Hokuto looked precisely like an art intern would look in people's minds.
Hokuto stopped in front of Taiga's table. His hands were shoved into his pockets, but he took them out and crossed them politely in front of him. He nodded in greeting.
"Hello," he said. "Kyomoto, right?"
His voice was lower than Taiga expected.
"Hello," Taiga responded politely. "Yes, that'd be me."
"I'm Matsumura Hokuto. Nice to meet you."
"Likewise."
After that, neither of them spoke, and Taiga could feel the quiet stretching a little too long.
Hokuto glanced at the empty chair across from Taiga as if he wasn't sure if he was supposed to sit down or just stand there. He cleared his throat and gestured vaguely towards the chair.
"Uh—should I…?"
"Oh yes, sorry. Go ahead, sit down. If you want, I mean."
Hokuto pulled out the chair and sat down, resting his arms on the table but not entirely leaning in. Taiga drummed his fingers against the table, resisting the urge to sigh. Why did this feel like a job interview neither of them had prepared for?
"So," Taiga finally said. "You're my assistant now."
"Yes," Hokuto replied.
More silence.
"Did Kochi tell you much about the exhibition?" Taiga continued, deciding to try at least to get the conversation moving.
"Not really," Hokuto said. "Just that it's a photography exhibition, and I'm supposed to help you."
Taiga narrowed his eyes a little. That sounded like the bare minimum. Then again, maybe Hokuto didn't care enough to ask for more details.
"You don't have experience in photography, do you?" Taiga asked, already pretty sure he knew the answer.
Hokuto shook his head. "No, not really. I mean, I take pictures sometimes, but just on my phone. Nothing serious."
Taiga had figured as much. "Then why this job?"
Hokuto tilted his head slightly. "I didn't pick it. It was part of the internship program. They assigned me here."
"Right. The funding deal."
Taiga exhaled through his nose. Of course, it wasn't like Hokuto had chosen to be here either.
Hokuto seemed to pick up on his tone. "But I don't mind," he said quickly. "I like art. I like learning new things."
At least that was not the worst answer.
"Have you done anything similar before?" Taiga asked.
Hokuto thought for a moment. "I worked at a bookstore once."
"A bookstore?"
"Yeah." Hokuto nodded. "For a few months. It was nice. Quiet."
Taiga waited for him to elaborate that somehow but Hokuto didn't. He really wasn't a talker.
Taiga glanced at Hokuto's sweater again. The holes weren't symmetrical. Was that on purpose? He had to assume it was. The whole thing looked expensive in a way that only ridiculous fashion could be.
He realized Hokuto was looking at him expectantly.
"What?" Taiga asked.
Hokuto hesitated. "I mean, you're in charge, right? I guess you give me the instructions and tell me what to do."
Taiga blinked.
"I can do anything," Hokuto said, and Taiga had no idea if that was meant to be reassuring or a threat.
"Anything?" Taiga repeated.
"Yeah. Whatever you need."
Taiga considered that for a moment. He still wasn't sure what exactly assistants were supposed to do. Still, if Hokuto was going to follow him around, he might as well make himself useful.
"Well, I'm going out tomorrow to shoot some test photos for the project," he started. He continued by explaining that he'd need someone to help carry the props, hold up the lighting reflector, and maybe adjust the umbrella for diffusing light if they shot in direct sun. Usually, he managed on his own, balancing the equipment between short trips back and forth, but having an extra set of hands might actually save him some time.
After Taiga was done with the explanation, Hokuto nodded.
"Okay."
Taiga glanced at Hokuto, waiting to see if he would ask anything else. He didn't.
Right. A talker, Hokuto was not.
"Do you have any questions?" Taiga still wanted to ask. Although he was still totally against this assistant thing, he did want the project and the exhibition to be successful.
"No, sounds easy enough," Hokuto answered, shrugging.
Taiga gave him a skeptical look. "You say that now."
"I mean, I'll find out tomorrow, right?"
"Well, in any case, meet me here at noon," Taiga said, motioning around the large pavement area between the café and gate.
Hokuto nodded again. "Got it."
"Good."
The conversation had already run dry, and there was no reason to keep sitting here awkwardly.
"You can go now," Taiga said, lifting his cup of now-cold coffee and taking a sip of it.
"Oh." Hokuto looked slightly surprised, as if he had been waiting for something else. "Okay. See you tomorrow, then."
He pushed back his chair and stood up, adjusting the sleeves of his sweater. It looked like he might say something else, his lips parting just slightly, but whatever thought had crossed his mind, he kept it to himself. Instead, he gave a small bow and thanked Taiga one more time.
Then he turned and walked away towards the station, the loose hem of his moth-eaten sweater catching slightly on the wind.
Taiga exhaled as soon as Hokuto was out of sight. He slumped back in his chair and mentally reviewed the short meeting.
Hokuto truly wasn't the talkative type. Or maybe he just didn't want to talk to Taiga. Either way, it was actually kind of relief because Taiga didn't have the patience for small talk while he was working. The whole situation was already going to be vexing. Another person in his space, watching him work, standing around while he would need to focus. He had never done that before.
With a sigh, Taiga finished the last of his coffee and stood up. Whatever. He'd deal with it tomorrow.
Taiga arrived at their meeting spot a few minutes early. For his luck, the train ride hadn't been too bad; he had purposely avoided rush hour to spare himself the agony of being crushed by commuters while carrying all his equipment.
The air was crisp with a touch of winter, even though the sun was bright and February was almost over. Taiga glanced around, scanning for Hokuto. It didn't take long to spot him.
Hokuto was walking toward him, back straight, and when Taiga got a clear look at him, he nearly sighed out loud.
If yesterday's sweater had been an artistic choice, today's outfit was something else again. Hokuto had thrown on a long, dark coat and left it open, revealing an oversized white T-shirt underneath, emblazoned with a massive print of Popeye flexing his cartoonishly large arms. This was paired with striped pants that looked suspiciously like pajamas. To top it all off, Hokuto was wearing polished leather shoes. It looked like he had dressed for a business dinner and a nap, but he couldn't decide which one to commit to.
"Hi," Taiga greeted him.
"Hi."
Silence.
"Nice shoes," Taiga commented because it was the only part of the outfit that made any sense at all.
Hokuto glanced down at them. "Thanks. They're comfortable."
Taiga had many questions about that statement because he was quite sure that leather shoes weren't supposed to be comfortable to begin with. Instead, he motioned toward the park.
"Come on. Let's get started."
Hokuto followed without saying anything as they made their way into Yoyogi Park. It was a good day to take test shots. There was enough light to work with, but not so much that everything would be washed out. The trees were still mostly bare, but here and there, some green was pushing through some of the branches.
It was peaceful, probably because it was a weekday. It was mostly just the two of them, with only the occasional jogger or dog walker passing by. Now that Taiga thought about it, he regretted suggesting such an isolated place. He had known it would be terribly awkward, of course, but he hadn't realized just how much. The quiet of their walk only made the discomfort worse, and there was nothing around them to distract themselves and focus on something other than the fact that they were alone. They didn't know each other, Hokuto wasn't exactly a chatterbox, and Taiga himself wasn't good at keeping any small talk going, either.
Taiga wracked his brain, trying to figure out what to talk about. But before he could settle on any topic, it was Hokuto who broke the silence first.
"So, what's the theme of the exhibition again?"
Taiga was surprised. He hadn't expected Hokuto to sound that interested, or maybe he was just excellent at faking it. But at least he had initiated some sort of a conversation.
"Change," Taiga answered. "Or process."
"That's vague," Hokuto commented.
"Yeah," Taiga admitted, scratching the back of his neck, which he always did when he was nervous. "But that's kind of the point. I just want to capture something that doesn't happen all at once but gradually. Something that shifts without you realizing it's happening."
Hokuto hummed. "So, what are you going to shoot then?"
Taiga motioned to their surroundings with a sweep of his hands.
"All this. Right now, everything still looks dead. But soon, little by little, things will change. The air will feel different at first. Then, buds will appear. The trees will bloom, the cherry blossoms will come and go, and before you know it, everything's green. It's one of the biggest changes in the shortest time."
Taiga watched as Hokuto clearly thought it over, his gaze shifting to the trees around them.
"So you're following the seasons," Hokuto stated.
"Kind of," Taiga said. "But I also want to include the second meaning how things might change without one noticing. One day, one thinks it's always the same, and then suddenly, one looks around, and everything's different. The same street, the same trees—but they don't feel the same anymore."
"I get that," Hokuto said softly.
Taiga glanced at him curiously. Hokuto didn't elaborate but went on with his questioning.
"So, you planning to take pictures of landscapes for this project then?"
"Not actually," Taiga said. "I mean, I generally like details more, so I'd like to focus on them. Details of landscapes."
"Details?"
"Yeah. Like…" Taiga thought for a second about how to explain it properly. "Not the whole tree, but how the light hits the leaves. Or how a shadow falls across a street sign. That kind of stuff."
Hokuto hummed, once again looking around the park as if he were seeing it differently.
"Sounds like you artists see things differently from others," he said thoughtfully.
Taiga huffed a quiet laugh. "Yeah, maybe."
Once they arrived at the suitable spot with some outdoor tables and benches for picnic use, Taiga set his bags down. After adjusting the lens to the largest one he had, he began fiddling with the settings, ensuring everything was dialled in just right. He left the camera hanging from his neck by a strap before taking a foldable reflector and handing it over to Hokuto.
"Here, hold this reflector."
Hokuto took it, gripping the edges carefully like he had just been handed something far more valuable than a simple photography tool.
They started working, mostly in silence. Taiga focused on his test shots, pausing occasionally to tweak settings, adjust angles, or reposition himself. For his part, Hokuto stood there quietly beside him, shifting the reflector when Taiga told him to do so but otherwise not doing much. It was peaceful.
Then, out of nowhere, Hokuto spoke again.
"Do you want something?"
Taiga, peering through his lens, barely glanced up. "Huh?"
"Like water, or a sandwich, or some coffee," Hokuto said. "I could go get something for us."
Taiga lowered his camera and squinted at him. "Are you bored?"
Hokuto shrugged. "No. Just figured you might want something."
"You're my assistant, not my secretary. And definitely not my servant."
"So… is that a no?"
"That's a no."
"Okay," Hokuto said simply, then went right back to holding a reflector.
Awkward.
Taiga focused back on the work at hand, adjusting his lens and taking another shot. He could hear the quiet swish of the reflector as Hokuto adjusted it, holding it just the right way as Taiga directed him. He didn't have to explain much because Hokuto just seemed to know what to do.
Taiga noticed Hokuto glancing at the camera now and then.
After a few more shots, Taiga decided it was time to wrap up. He wasn't planning on using these shots anyway.
"Alright, that's enough for now," he finally said, lowering the camera. "Let's pack up."
They gathered the equipment in silence.
"You want to try the camera?" Taiga asked before he was about to put his camera back into the bag.
Hokuto blinked. "Huh?"
"I said, you want to try it out?" Taiga repeated, holding out his camera. "You seemed interested earlier."
Hokuto hesitated before accepting the camera, turning it over extremely carefully in his hands as if he were holding something fragile.
"I've never really used one before," Hokuto muttered.
"That's the point. You don't have to know anything," Taiga said with a shrug. "Just point it at something interesting and press the button. See what happens."
Hokuto eyed him suspiciously before lifting the camera and snapping a shot of the trees in front of them. He looked at the screen, then back at Taiga. Taiga sent him an encouraging smirk.
"See. Not that difficult."
Hokuto quickly grinned back at him, then took another shot, this time of the gravel path beneath them. Then he snapped a picture of Taiga's bags on the bench, a crow on the roof of the public toilet, and his shoes. Then, his gaze wandered toward Taiga.
"Hey," he called out, raising the camera. "Smile."
"Huh?"
Hokuto raised the camera higher, and the shutter clicked as he snatched a picture of Taiga.
"You're my first model ever now,” he proclaimed proudly.
"Yeah yeah, right," Taiga said, taking a half-step back and feeling his cheeks flushing a little bit. "In the future, you should at least warn people before you take a picture of them."
Hokuto didn't respond. He just adjusted the camera angle again and took another picture of the tree. Taiga noticed Hokuto's brows furrowed slightly in concentration as he lined up the shot. There was something endearing about how focused he looked.
"Not bad," Taiga commented as he leaned in to check the camera screen over Hokuto's shoulder. "You're picking it up faster than I thought."
Hokuto looked embarrassed as he lowered the camera and let out a shy laugh.
"I highly doubt it. But I guess it's fun."
"Be careful, or you might end up buying your own camera soon," Taiga couldn't help teasing him.
"Like I said, I highly doubt that," Hokuto answered.
"That's what they all say."
Hokuto hummed, looking back at the camera screen. "But seriously, what would I have to do if I actually wanted to learn?"
Taiga shrugged. That was a tough question. "I mean, there's a lot. Composition, lighting, angles, camera settings, and so on. But the first step is just taking a lot of pictures. Looking at things that could be captured. And then figuring out what kind of stuff you like to shoot."
Hokuto nodded and looked thoughtful. "So you weren't instantly good at it?"
Taiga scoffed. "Obviously not. You should've seen my first photos. They were complete garbage."
"I'd like to see them," Hokuto said with a small smile.
"Too bad I deleted them."
They kept at it for a while, Hokuto occasionally taking pictures while Taiga gave him small pointers. Eventually, though, Taiga's stomach let out a growl, which Hokuto clearly heard as he turned to him.
"You should've let me go get you something earlier," he said.
Taiga waved his hand.
"Come on, let's just go eat."
Taiga barely glanced at the menu before deciding.
"Get whatever you want. It's on me," he said.
Hokuto looked at him with a surprised face. "Why?"
"Consider it payment for your hard work as my assistant."
Hokuto didn't argue, flipping through the menu before choosing something.
As they waited for their food, Taiga stretched his arms over his head.
"I was thinking of going to a shrine for the next shoot," he said.
"Oh, any specific one in your mind?" Hokuto asked.
"There's a small, not-that-famous one near Kanda. It's not usually super crowded. That place has good architecture and a nice garden, and the torii gate would make a nice background."
Hokuto nodded. "Sounds fine."
Taiga glanced at him. "You always agree on everything just like that?"
"I'm not the artist here. I just show up," Hokuto grinned.
Taiga smirked back.
"Fair enough."
-----
By the time Taiga got home, the sun had already set. He set his bags down by the door and shrugged off his coat, exhaling as he rolled his shoulders.
He pulled out the camera from the bag and went to the kitchen, setting it on the counter before reaching for a bottle of cold water from the fridge. After taking a long, satisfying sip, he leaned back against the counter, rolling the bottle between his palms as his thoughts drifted back to the afternoon. Or, more specifically, to Hokuto.
The day hadn't been that bad. It had actually gone much smoother than Taiga had expected. Despite still not being the biggest talker, Hokuto had been surprisingly easy to work with. He hadn't complained, hadn't acted like it was a burden to be there, and he'd done everything without being asked twice. And the way he'd looked, wearing that absurd outfit, like he'd just thrown things on but somehow still managed to make it work. Taiga couldn't help letting out a small chuckle when remembering that.
Taiga grabbed his camera and started scrolling through the shots. As expected, they were typical test pictures. Some of them were too blurry or stiff, and most of them were basically nothing interesting. But then, near the end, he noticed something that caught his attention: a picture Hokuto had taken.
Taiga paused and zoomed on it. It was a shot of Taiga himself, and the light hitting his face was just right. His expression was serious, but there was something compelling about it. Despite the lack of a smile, the way the light caught him made him look somewhat different, almost unfamiliar. It was a side of himself he hadn't noticed before. Taiga lingered on the image longer than he should have, quietly impressed by how Hokuto had managed to capture something new just like that.
Then he clicked his tongue and straightened up. He shouldn't be thinking about useless stuff like that when there was still work to do. Reviewing all the test shots properly and planning the next session were the things that mattered. Hokuto was only his assistant; he was there to help him, nothing more.
He set the camera down on the counter and turned toward the bathroom. He was just tired.
Taiga didn't even blink this time when he saw Hokuto's outfit. It was just all in all already at this point easier to accept that Hokuto simply dressed like this. Today, he wore a jacket that looked like it belonged to three different eras; it was half denim, half some embroidered silk, with oversized sleeves that almost swallowed his hands. And somehow, it suited him. Weirdly.
"Morning," Hokuto greeted, hands stuffed into his sleeves like a kid.
"Morning," Taiga replied.
Hokuto tilted his head. "No other comments?"
"If you're waiting for me to say something about your shoes or whatever, I've already given up."
Hokuto grinned. "That's probably for the best."
They headed toward the main courtyard. It was the same as last time, awkward and quiet, but Taiga was starting to get used to that, too. Hokuto wasn't the type to talk unless he had something to say, and Taiga didn't feel like forcing conversation just for the sake of it. And it looked like they were both okay with that.
Although it had been a while since his last visit, the shrine was just as beautiful as Taiga remembered it to be. He took his time setting up his camera before he started taking pictures. He started with the torii gate. Then he moved on to the main hall, focusing on its details: the curved roof, the detailed carvings on the eaves, and the sunlight hitting the wooden beams. He crouched down for a low-angle shot, then stepped back to capture the wider view.
Hokuto stood nearby, as quiet as always but attentive. Every time Taiga reached for a different lens, Hokuto was already handing it over, whether Taiga needed a wide-angle for the full structure or a prime lens for the intricate details. Hokuto held the lens caps in one hand, tucking them into his sleeve to keep them from getting lost.
"Thanks," Taiga mumbled as he swapped lenses again.
Hokuto just nodded, watching as Taiga kept working.
After a while, Taiga's shoulders started to ache from holding the camera, and he decided to take a break. They found a small bench near the purification fountain. Hokuto sat down first, immediately tugging his oversized sleeves over his hands.
He pulled a bottle of water from his bag, twisting off the cap before holding it out. "Here."
Taiga stared at the bottle in Hokuto's hand for half a second, but then he took it, drinking a few sips before handing it back.
Hokuto looked amused as he took the bottle. "Oh? You're actually taking something from me this time."
"Don't make it weird," Taiga said.
Hokuto hummed in response, taking a sip himself before capping the bottle again. He looked satisfied, which only made Taiga roll his eyes and glance away.
"Do you always work like this?" Hokuto asked after a moment.
"Like what?"
"Not stopping until your shoulders are about to fall off or you're dying of thirst."
Taiga shrugged. "If the pictures are good, everything's worth it."
Hokuto hummed as if he understood but didn't entirely agree. He leaned back against the bench, stretching his legs out.
They sat there for a few minutes, not saying much to each other. The shrine wasn't crowded at all; once again, only a few people and shrine staff passed by.
Eventually, Hokuto stood up, brushing nonexistent dust from his pants.
"I'm gonna get an omikuji," he said over his shoulder, already heading toward the small stand nearby.
Taiga leaned back, watching Hokuto shake the wooden box and pull out a numbered stick. The attendant handed him a fortune slip, and Hokuto unfolded it with the same calm expression he always had until his lips pressed into a thin line.
As he walked towards the wooden frame where people tied their unlucky fortunes, Taiga grinned.
"Bad luck?" he hollered behind him, but Hokuto didn't bother answering.
Hokuto's long fingers carefully wrapped the thin paper slip around the string. Taiga lifted his camera, almost out of instinct, and snapped a shot of it.
Hokuto finished tying the paper, giving it one last tug to make sure it stayed in place. Then, as if sensing Taiga's camera on him, he turned his head slightly.
"Oi, did you just take a picture of my suffering?" he exclaimed.
Taiga lowered the camera and smirked. "Maybe. It's not every day I see someone struggle with a knot that badly.""
Hokuto returned and sat beside Taiga on the bench, letting out a light, amused laugh. "Figures."
Hokuto's eyes crinkled at the corners as he laughed. The sunlight caught the faint freckles scattered across the bridge of his nose, making them more noticeable than usual.
Taiga quickly brought his focus back to his camera, the lens catching his own reflection for a moment before fiddling with the settings once again, though the camera didn't need any adjustment at all. But that way he almost could ignore how his pulse had picked up just slightly.
"Shall we continue?" he muttered, pushing himself up from the bench.
-----
Taiga checked his camera battery and glanced around. "I'm gonna hit the toilet. Hold this."
He handed the camera to Hokuto, who took it without saying anything, cradling it with the same careful grip that had already become his trademark.
"Feel free to take some shots again if you want," Taiga added over his shoulder before heading off.
When he returned, he stopped short at the sight of Hokuto using the camera.
For a moment, Taiga just watched him from a few meters away. Hokuto was taking pictures of the ema plaques hanging in neat rows. Then he moved, aiming at the stone fox statue beside the offering box.
Taiga found himself smiling before he even realized it.
Hokuto must have sensed him because he turned around a second later. He blinked, then straightened up before clearing his throat.
"Can I take a picture of you?"
Taiga raised a brow. "Why?"
"Because I want to, and I was already about to do it, but you told me to always ask if I was going to do so."
Taiga snorted. "Well, since you asked so nicely, I guess it's fine."
Hokuto's lips quirked up like he was pleased with himself. He gestured toward the torii gate near the entrance. "Stand there."
Taiga rolled his eyes but walked over, standing beneath the bright gate. Instead of stepping back to frame the shot so that the gate would have been there as a whole, Hokuto moved close.
"I have no idea how to pose, I don't know where to look," Taiga mumbled.
"Then don't look," Hokuto replied lightly, lifting the camera.
Taiga sighed but stayed put. The shutter clicked.
-----
Later that week, Taiga met with Kochi to review the exhibition details. They found a quiet café near the gallery, their table quickly full of papers and notes among coffee cups as they went through them.
Kochi flipped through Taiga's notes with a frown, then shot him a skeptical look over his cup. "You're gonna have to start typing these. Your handwriting is horrible."
"It's fine," Taiga said without looking up. "I can read it."
"Yeah, but unfortunately, I have to read it too." Kochi turned a page sideways.
Taiga ignored him, scanning his notes. "We're still on schedule, though," he said.
"Barely." Kochi tapped a pen against the table. "Final frame orders are due next month's first Friday. You done picking the spots?"
"Almost," Taiga said. That wasn't entirely the lie because the truth was that he just wasn't completely sure about a few of his choices.
Kochi looked at him over the rim of his cup as if he were waiting for more. "Any shoots done?"
Taiga nodded. "Went to Yoyogi Park for test shoots and earlier this week to a shrine in Kanda."
"Oh, nice. Did you manage to get anything good?"
"Something. But at least I got a better idea of what I want."
Kochi hummed and flipped to another page. "And how's your assistant situation?"
Taiga looked up at the odd phrasing.
"What do you mean by 'how's my assistant situation'?" he asked.
Maybe Taiga's reaction had been too quick because Kochi smirked dangerously.
"I mean, how's that Matsumura Hokuto been?" Kochi clarified.
Taiga looked away, pretending to focus on his coffee. "Weird," he muttered, taking a long sip as if that would make Kochi drop the subject. But, of course, Kochi wouldn't.
"Yeah?" Kochi leaned in slightly.
"Yeah. His style is weird, the way he talks is weird, and his vibe is weird. Today, he wore these ridiculous clothes again. Apparently, he just keeps wearing whatever he finds interesting and puts them together."
Kochi looked way too amused. "And?" he pressed.
"And…" Taiga paused, taking a moment to try and figure out how to phrase what he was thinking. He thought about Hokuto's quiet attentiveness, his careful handling of things given to him, and how he somehow understood what Taiga wanted when it came to his work.
He also thought about those few photos Hokuto had taken of him earlier and how they had actually turned out nice. Taiga wasn't sure why that stuck with him, but it did. Maybe he was just a little surprised that Hokuto had an eye for that kind of thing.
"He's been actually quite helpful so far," he concluded, muttering the last words.
Kochi's smirk widened.
"Oh, shut up," Taiga warned him.
"I didn't say anything."
"You're thinking something."
"And whose fault is that?" Kochi tilted his head, looking way too smug for his own good. "Since you kind of just said you like having him around?"
Taiga made a face. "Like is a way too strong word, thank you very much."
"Alright, fine. You enjoy working with him."
"Also a strong word."
"You don't hate working with him."
Taiga rolled his eyes. "Yeah, fine. I don't hate working with him."
Kochi beamed victoriously. "Knew it."
Taiga groaned. "Why are we even talking about this?"
"Because it's fun for me," Kochi said brightly. Then he rested his chin on his hand, eyes glinting. "So, are you going to keep him?"
Taiga blinked. "What?"
"You know. As a permanent assistant. Keep him around for all your exhibitions and projects."
Taiga stared at him with an expression like Kochi had just grown a second head.
"Are you serious? I've met him, like, twice," he said.
Kochi shrugged. "Yeah, but clearly, that was enough for you to go from 'I don't want an assistant' to 'this guy's actually kinda useful.'"
"That does not mean I want to hire him," Taiga pointed out.
"Why not? You clearly work well together. You didn't even complain about him once until I brought it up now."
"Because I didn't even think about him until you brought it up!"
"Which means he wasn't bothering you."
Taiga let out a strangled noise. "You're twisting my words!"
Kochi grinned. "No, I'm just pointing out the facts."
Taiga picked up his coffee cup and didn't answer.
Kochi took a sip of his own coffee, still looking unbearably smug. "So, should I start drafting a new contract…?"
"I will block your number," Taiga said to him dryly.
"You always threaten me with that like I wouldn't have been blocked before."
"Yeah, and I can do it again."
Kochi only laughed at that, clearly satisfied with himself. Taiga, however, wanted nothing more than to bury his face in the table and curse himself for every word he'd let slip. This was exactly why he hated talking to Kochi. Because no matter how hard he tried, he always ended up saying more than he ever meant to.
Taiga followed a strict schedule the following week, planning every photo session to the last detail. But no matter how organized he thought he was, time never felt like enough. There were too many ideas in his head, too many locations he wanted to visit, and too many things he hadn't figured out. Some days, everything worked. On those days, he could visit the location during the perfect weather, which made the light perfect, and the shots matched exactly what he had in his head. On other days, nothing worked. The angles felt wrong, the colors looked dull, or the movement he was trying to capture with the camera just didn't come through the way he wanted. On those days, he couldn't help but feel frustrated, and that made him question everything, whether it was his skills, his vision, or even the whole project.
Through it all, Hokuto was there. Every single day.
Most of the time, Taiga didn't even have to arrange it anyhow because he didn't even need to text him first. Before he could pick up his phone, a message from Hokuto would already be there.
Matsumura Hokuto:
What time tomorrow? Where do you need me?😊🌸
Hokuto made things steady. Easy. Reliable.
The first time Hokuto showed up with an extra onigiri, Taiga shook his head. "I’m good," he said, barely looking up from his camera. He had already accepted drinks from Hokuto, but the food was too much.
The second time, Hokuto just set the onigiri beside him without a word. Taiga ignored it.
The third time, Hokuto unwrapped it for him. "You should eat," he said simply, holding it out.
"I'm fine," Taiga muttered but then took a bite.
By the fourth time, Hokuto had upgraded to a full convenience store meal. He handed Taiga a bento like it was non-negotiable.
Taiga sighed. "I told you, I don’t need—"
"When’s the last time you ate?" Hokuto interrupted.
Taiga paused. Then, with a dramatic sigh, he opened the bento.
"Thought so," Hokuto said, looking too smug.
Taiga should have been annoyed by someone fussing and following him all the time like that. Maybe he had been at first since he had always thought he liked doing things alone - just like he had told Kochi. But the truth was, he had found himself liking having an assistant more and more. Or maybe, even if he didn't want to admit it properly, he had found himself liking having especially Hokuto around him.
He especially appreciated the quiet moments between shoots when they grabbed convenience store coffee and talked about nothing.
"Why do you always get the same overly-sugared canned coffee?" Hokuto asked one afternoon, eyeing Taiga's drink.
Taiga shrugged. "Because it's good."
"That's the saddest review I've ever heard. 'It's good.' No passion. No excitement. Nothing." Hokuto shook his head in exaggerated disappointment. "Try mine."
Taiga took a sip of Hokuto's drink. Too bitter. Way too bitter.
Hokuto grinned at his expression. "Okay, you just have the coffee preferences of a child."
Taiga rolled his eyes at him but couldn't hide his smile.
It was little moments like that. Casual, easy conversations with some teasing that made everything feel somehow better.
Taiga liked when Hokuto made offhanded comments about lighting and angles as if he actually cared about photography and wanted to understand what Taiga was doing. He liked it when Hokuto playfully complained about his gear weighing too much but still carried it anyway. He liked the way Hokuto always showed up exactly on time, never late, never flustered, just there.
And in the end, it wasn't only the professional things he liked.
He liked the way Hokuto paid attention. He constantly paid attention to other people, especially Taiga. He seemed to notice when Taiga was too lost in his own head and knew exactly when to crack a joke or when to stay quiet. He never made things complicated, never pushed, or never expected anything in return.
That's why Taiga had started looking forward to their sessions together. More than that, he had caught himself thinking more and more often about Hokuto even when they weren't shooting. For example, when he was editing, he sometimes wondered what Hokuto would say about a certain picture. Or when he saw some interesting piece of clothing and thought Hokuto would probably like it.
He had been telling himself it was just a new habit. That was just the way things worked and it was natural since they were spending so much time together.
But then, some of his thoughts had started shifting into even more dangerous levels.
He had started noticing the way Hokuto always smelled like something clean and expensive, like a mix of fresh laundry and cologne he didn't recognize. The way Hokuto rolled his sleeves up when it got warm like it was nothing, and how Taiga had to pretend he wasn't looking at the lines of his forearms. The way Hokuto chuckled at Taiga's dry jokes, even when barely anyone else Taiga knew found them funny.
The way Hokuto's presence felt comfortable. And how Taiga had started to crave it.
He liked all of it.
Too much.
Wait.
Taiga blinked, realizing he had been staring at the same photo for way too long.
He sighed, dragging his left hand through his hair, then forced himself to refocus. The files weren't going to sort themselves. He needed to get through this task. He needed to separate the usable shots from the ones that weren't worth keeping. He was getting better at letting go of bad ones and better at not overanalyzing his mistakes.
At least, he thought he was.
Until his eyes caught a photo, he didn't remember taking.
It was another random photo of Hokuto. He was standing on the rooftop of a café they had stopped by on Wednesday. Hokuto's eyes were squinting in the wind, and his hair was a bit messy. The shot was nothing special, to be honest. It had a bad composition and even worse lighting. It wasn't part of the project; it was just a random snap.
Taiga should have deleted it.
Instead, he ignored the extra beat his heart skipped and dragged the file into an archived folder.
-----
They were back in Shibuya, walking down a street near Miyashita Park. Taiga had considered doing a nighttime shoot, playing with city lights and reflections. Still, somehow, they had just ended up mostly wandering the area instead. His shots tonight hadn't worked, and he didn't know why.
"I thought we were taking pictures," Hokuto said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.
"I'm thinking," Taiga answered.
Hokuto made a soft, amused sound. "You think a lot."
Taiga smiled. "Shut up."
They kept walking. Taiga took a few shots of light trails from passing cars and the rain-damp pavement, but nothing felt quite right.
They stopped at a crosswalk, waiting for the light to change. Taiga adjusted the strap of his camera, his fingers curling around the lens cap, but he didn't lift it.
Hokuto shifted beside him, glancing at the camera in his hands. "Thinking again?"
Taiga hummed in response.
The pedestrian signal turned green, and they moved with the crowd. They walked a little bit more until they found a quieter alley.
Hokuto glanced around. "You're into contrasts, right?" He nodded toward the ground, where a small puddle reflected the street lights. "That's cool."
Taiga looked at him. "Why do you actually sound like you know what you're talking about?"
Hokuto smirked. "I pay attention, and I've learned more things from you and about you."
Taiga bit the inside of his cheek, then lifted his camera. He snapped a shot of the puddle. Then something else caught his eye. A vending machine stood a few steps away, its neon glow cutting through the darkness.
Taiga exhaled, shifting his stance, framing the shot in his head—
But then Hokuto moved, stepping toward the vending machine and crouching slightly as if considering a drink. The neon glow caught him at just the right angle, accentuating the sharp lines of his face and outlining his profile against the light. His one hand remained tucked in his pocket while the other moved near the selection buttons.
Taiga's breath hitched.
It was perfect.
Click.
Taiga lowered the camera and checked the screen.
"What?" Hokuto asked, confused.
"You just made the shot better," Taiga said, motioning for him to come closer to take a look.
Hokuto came to stand next to him. He leaned in, their arms brushing as he looked over the screen. "Is that so?"
"Yeah." Taiga glanced at Hokuto next to him and suddenly felt something warm settling in his chest. "Guess you really are helpful."
Hokuto grinned, bumping his shoulder against Taiga's as they continued walking.
-----
By the time they wrapped up, it was late, the last train cutting it close. Taiga could feel exhaustion settling deep in his muscles, an ache in his neck and shoulders from walking all evening and carrying heavy camera with him, but he ignored it. He wasn't about to start complaining, especially not when Hokuto would use it against him somehow.
Except, of course, he noticed it anyway.
"Is your neck hurting?" Hokuto asked as they were walking towards the station.
"No," Taiga muttered, though he knew he was a bad liar.
"It is." Hokuto slowed his pace, eyeing him for a moment before shaking his head. "Give me that."
Before Taiga could protest, Hokuto reached for his camera bag, quickly slipping the strap off his shoulder. It was heavier than it looked, weighted down by extra lenses, batteries, and whatever else Taiga had crammed throughout the day. Yet, Hokuto didn't say anything about it, slinging it over his own shoulder like it was nothing.
"Seriously, I can carry—"
"Yeah, I'm sure you could," Hokuto cut him off. "But just let me help you, okay? You'll barely make it home as it is. Besides, this is my job."
Taiga scowled, but he didn't argue. He was too tired for it, and some traitorous part of him didn't mind Hokuto's help.
The train ride was quiet. The steady hum of movement almost lulled Taiga into a daze. Occasionally, he glanced at Hokuto, who sat beside him, arms folded, head tilted slightly back like he could fall asleep, too. Taiga's camera bag rested between Hokuto's ankles, looking strangely at home there.
Something in that sight made Taiga's stomach twist, but he ignored it.
When the train slowed at his stop, he instinctively shifted forward to stand, but to his surprise, Hokuto moved too, pushing off the seat beside him.
Taiga frowned. He had been ready to just take the bag, say thanks, and call it a night.
Hokuto scoffed, catching the expression on his face. "You think I'm letting you limp home by yourself?"
"I'm not limping," Taiga said quickly. He was absolutely limping.
Hokuto adjusted the bag on his shoulder. "Just tell me where," he said simply.
Taiga sighed as they stepped out of the train. "Fine. This way."
The streets were quiet as it was already quite late. They walked in near silence, Taiga a step ahead, acutely aware of Hokuto's presence behind him and the soft scuff of his footsteps.
When they reached his apartment building, Taiga turned around, gesturing the bag on Hokuto's shoulder. "I can take it from here."
Hokuto didn't move an inch at first. Instead, he watched Taiga with an unreadable expression. "You sure? I can come up and bring this inside. Besides, those stairs look steep."
Taiga's breath caught. His mind stuttered.
The suggestion was nothing. It could be nothing. Just a practical offer where Hokuto was making sure Taiga wouldn't collapse the second he stepped inside. But still, it felt like something else.
The stupid part was that Taiga almost told him yes. Nearly let him follow him up the stairs, into his apartment, into something he didn't know how to name.
"No need, I'm good," he managed to say finally.
For a second, Hokuto didn’t react. His fingers curled slightly against the strap, his grip not loosening.
"Okay then," Hokuto then murmured, stepping back. "Go get some sleep."
Taiga tightened his grip on the strap. "Yeah. Thanks. You too."
He turned toward the stairs, but even as he climbed them, he could still feel Hokuto watching him.
One morning, Hokuto sent a simple message that made Taiga's stomach twist.
Hokuto:
Not feeling great today😥
It's because of my anemia
Visited a doctor, so everything's alright. But I guess I need to rest and skip the shooting for today
Sorry for the trouble~😔
Taiga stared at the message for a long moment before locking his phone and putting it face down on the table.
It wasn't a big deal, he repeated to himself several times. Hokuto had mentioned before that he had anemia, and it wasn't like he was dying or anything. He had explained once how his symptoms usually were and how sometimes he could be more tired than normal, maybe a little weak, but nothing that some rest and a quick hospital visit wouldn't help. No big deal.
Taiga wasn't worried. He was just—
Well. He was just sitting there thinking about Hokuto being pale and exhausted, alone in his apartment, probably not eating and not being able to take care of himself properly.
Before noticing, Taiga was already on the train to Hokuto's neighborhood after finding directions to his address through the map application on his phone.
After getting off the train, he stopped by the nearest convenience store and bought some things. He packed the basket with mostly snacks, vitamin drinks, and something that looked like it would be good or somewhat helpful by being easy to drink or eat.
When he arrived at Hokuto's place, he pressed the intercom button and cleared his throat.
Hokuto's voice came through a few seconds later, sounding low and sluggish.
"…Yeah?"
Taiga hesitated, then went with whatever excuse first popped into his head. "I—I was around the area when I got your message. Just thought I'd drop by quickly to check you're not dead."
There was a long, dead silence.
"Oh, this is Taiga, by the way," Taiga continued quickly. He cringed at himself internally but tried to keep his face straight - after all, he wasn't sure if Hokuto already saw him through the intercom camera.
Hokuto made a sound of either a scoff or a weak laugh.
"Oh, just randomly around this area?"
Taiga scowled. "Just open the door."
Another moment of silence. Then, the buzzer sounded, and Taiga let himself in.
When Hokuto opened the apartment door, he looked tired. His skin was a little pale, and his hair was a mess. He was wearing a loose hoodie and sweatpants. Taiga could tell he definitely wasn't dying, but he looked like someone who had spent the whole day in bed, which he probably had.
Hokuto's eyes flicked immediately down to Taiga's hand, where he held the plastic bag of things. "What's that?"
Taiga shoved the bag into Hokuto's chest, forcing him to take it. "It's for you. You probably haven't eaten all day."
Hokuto blinked down at the bag, then back at Taiga, lips wriggling into something almost a smirk. "You think I'm incapable of feeding myself?"
"I think anyone would be incapable of doing anything when they feel like crap," Taiga shot back.
Hokuto peeked into the bag. "You got me snacks and drinks like I'm a sick kid."
"Well, figured you wouldn't visit a supermarket or cook for yourself today," Taiga said. "Don't get me wrong, I'm not here to babysit you or anything. Just thought I'd drop by."
"Right." Hokuto pulled out one of the small juice bottles and inspected it. "It just happened that you were in the area."
"Yup. Besides, you're always reminding me to drink and eat. Think of it as payback."
"Okay, then." Hokuto let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head.
He stepped aside and motioned toward the living room behind him.
"Anyway, since you're here, you might as well sit down for a while," he said. "I was thinking about something for your exhibition, actually."
"Huh?"
"You mentioned maybe wanting to commission some stocks, right? Posters or prints." Hokuto waved lazily towards the the coffee table in the middle of the room where his laptop was. "Figured we could talk about that now."
"You're feeling like crap, and you want to work?" Taiga asked.
"I've been in a horizontal position for most of the day. Might as well use my brain a little at this point."
Hokuto turned around and went to sit down on the couch. He patted the space next to him.
"Unless you just came to stare at me and leave."
Taiga rolled his eyes but wiggled his shoes off and followed Hokuto further inside to the living room.
"Fine. But don't blame me if you collapse in the middle," he warned.
"Oh, that wouldn't be the first time."
Taiga huffed a quiet laugh as he sat down on the couch, watching as Hokuto flipped the laptop open.
-----
After drafting a short plan for the posters and some postcards together, Taiga looked around Hokuto's home properly. The place was small yet neat, with cute little accessories scattered here and there. The photographer's instinct kicked him all of a sudden.
Hokuto looked surprised for a second but shrugged. "Sure, why not? You think my apartment's interesting enough for a shoot?"
"Yeah," Taiga said. "You've got a good eye for stuff."
Hokuto laughed, but Taiga could tell he was flattered rather than making fun of him.
Taiga fished his camera out of his bag and started walking around the small aparment. He crouched down, focusing on the glasses left on Hokuto's desk. He adjusted the angle so that the sunlight came through the lens just right. Next, he turned to the stack of magazines on the kitchen table, snapping a few photos of the stacks.
"Mind if I get a shot of the pillow?" Taiga then asked, pointing to the dog-shaped cushion on the couch next to Hokuto.
"You want to photograph a pillow?"
"It's quirky and cute," Taiga shrugged.
Hokuto chuckled. "If you say so."
After a few more shots, Taiga came to sit on Hokuto's floor on the other side of the coffee table, his camera balanced on his knee as he scrolled through the shots he had taken. Hokuto was still curled up on the couch, watching him with a lazy sort of interest, his head tilted against the headrest.
The way he was sitting, half-curled into the couch, his hoodie loose around his shoulders, hair still a mess, made for a nice composition, Taiga realized suddenly. He raised the camera and snatched a picture.
The click of the camera made Hokuto lift his head. His eyes narrowed.
"Are you snapping candid pictures of me again?"
"No," Taiga replied quickly.
Hokuto rolled his eyes, straightening up a bit. "Oh, you definitely are. Want me to strike a pose?" He fluttered his lashes with exaggerated flair and rested his chin on his hand. The way his lazy expression turned into a playful challenge made Taiga's stomach do a weird flip.
"It's because you were in the way," Taiga muttered. "It's not my fault you keep ending up in the frame so often."
"Mm." Hokuto hummed. "Is that so?"
Before Taiga could come up with a retort, Hokuto suddenly moved from the couch to the floor next to him, plucking the camera right out of his hands. He turned the camera toward Taiga, raising it up with a smirk.
"Your turn."
"That's not—"
"What? You can take a picture of me in my half-dead state but can't handle a few of yourself?"
Taiga gave in with a sigh, leaning back on his hands. Hokuto grinned like he'd won something and lifted the camera, peering through the viewfinder.
Taiga could feel Hokuto's gaze on him, even if it was through the lens. It made his skin feel a little too warm.
Hokuto took a few shots. Then, he lowered the camera slightly and frowned.
"You're too stiff. Relax."
"I am relaxed."
Hokuto snorted. "No, you're acting like you're in a corporate headshot session. Just be natural."
He didn't give Taiga a chance to respond before reaching out and adjusting his posture, nudging his chin slightly and fixing his arm. The touch was light and playful, and Taiga should've swatted him away, but he didn't. His mind was suddenly a mess because he could recognize that familiar smell again, the mixture of fresh laundry and something sweet. Hokuto's smell.
Hokuto took another picture. And another.
"Okay, now you're just messing around again," Taiga muttered, but his voice definitely didn't come out annoyed like he had intended. More like shy.
"Am I?" Hokuto murmured. He set the camera down on his lap and looked at Taiga.
Taiga swallowed.
"I mean-," he started, but he wasn't sure what he meant to say.
"Don't be shy," Hokuto said lightly. "You're always so bossy, but when the camera's on you, you panic?"
"I'm not panicking," Taiga said.
Hokuto smirked at him.
"You're fun to mess with," he said.
Taiga huffed, reaching out to snatch the camera back, but Hokuto dodged it by stretching his hand and putting the camera far away from them on the floor. Then he shifted closer to Taiga—too close.
Taiga stilled.
Hokuto was watching him now with an odd look. It made Taiga's chest tighten in an unexpected way. He couldn't breathe properly all of a sudden.
Taiga barely had time to think about it more before Hokuto moved and closed the small distance between them, tilting his head slightly—
And kissed him.
It was perfect. Hokuto's lips were soft and warm, and the warm breath from his nose was fanning against Taiga's. The kiss stretched long enough for Taiga's brain to catch up, for the realization to hit that—
Oh. Oh.
Then Hokuto pulled back, studying him under his eyelashes like he was waiting for something from Taiga. Maybe a reaction. Maybe permission to continue.
Taiga had no idea what to do. His heart was beating so loud, and he could feel his face—no, he could feel his his whole body burning.
"What w—" His voice cracked because his throat felt too dry. He swallowed and tried again. "What was that?"
Hokuto's lips quirked slightly. "A kiss?"
"Yeah, no shit," Taiga said, still completely flustered. "I mean, why—" The sentence fell flat before he could end it.
Hokuto just looked at him, head tilted, like the answer was obvious. Like he was obvious.
Taiga's stomach was doing something ridiculous. He still felt like he was burning, and his entire body felt too warm.
"I need to go," he muttered.
Hokuto blinked, then let out a small laugh like he was in disbelief at what he had just heard. "What?"
"I have things to do," Taiga mumbled, standing up. "Work. Photos. Stuff. And you need to rest."
Hokuto raised an eyebrow. "Uh-huh."
Taiga was already grabbing his stuff, his heart still beating hard as he packed everything with him. He barely managed a quick "See you" before practically fleeing through the door.
-----
Taiga barely got any sleep that night.
Every time he closed his eyes, the feeling of Hokuto's lips against his own replayed in his mind. The warmth of it, the way Hokuto had leaned in, like it had been the most natural thing in the world. The memory of their bodies close to each other made Taiga's heart pound so loud and stomach twist so bad it was hard to ignore.
He hadn't known what to think then and still didn't know.
Rolling onto his stomach, he shoved his face into his pillow, groaning against the fabric.
It took forever before he finally managed to fall asleep.
In the morning, his phone buzzed next to him on the mattress. Taiga groaned, blindly reaching for it, and checked the screen. A message from someone. He wasn't sure if he wanted it to be Hokuto or not.
But when he opened the app, it was a message from Kochi.
Kochi:
Are you shooting today?
Taiga scowled and rubbed a hand over his face before typing back.
You:
No, but I'm busy.
Kochi:
Meet me for lunch? ^^
You:
I said I'm busy.
Kochi:
C'mon, I need to talk about some work stuff anyway. Take it as part of your work!
Taiga sighed. He could already tell there was no escaping this. Kochi was annoyingly persistent when he wanted to be. And maybe Taiga truly needed a distraction at that moment. Or maybe he needed to talk to someone. He wasn't sure yet.
He dragged himself out of bed and got dressed.
Taiga clicked the image inside the editor on his computer but wasn't even properly looking at the screen. The exhibition hall was quiet, and the white walls were still bare, waiting to be filled with the final selections.
Hokuto sat on the opposite side of the table, a catalog of the exhibition hall rooms open in front of him, and he occasionally took notes in his notebook.
They hadn't talked about the kiss. They hadn't talked about anything that had happened at Hokuto's place earlier.
They had held their last shooting together after Hokuto had been fine again and ready to return to work. Like all the other times, the shooting had gone smoothly. Maybe even too smoothly, in Taiga's opinion. The whole shooting had gone on with no teasing, bantering, or sneaky snapshots taken when the other hadn't been looking. Taiga had stayed behind the camera the whole time while Hokuto had helped him politely, just as their roles had strictly been in the beginning.
It was clear that after Taiga had panicked and run away from the awkward situation, Hokuto was no longer willing to bring up the topic between them and go back there what it might have been. Hokuto was a clever guy, so he probably had reasoned it was best to keep their relationship just cool and professional like it had been before.
So, during the shooting, Hokuto had looked all normal and he had shown no signs that would have made anyone think something was wrong between them. He hadn’t been doing anything that would have allowed Taiga to point out that he was acting weird. Hokuto had been doing his job as he should have. He had been polite and distant, which should have all been satisfying.
And yet, as Taiga stared blankly forward, thinking hard about it, nothing about it felt satisfying. Quite the opposite.
"Are you actually working or just staring at your screen?"
Taiga tensed at Hokuto's sudden question and immediately clicked something to look busy.
"I am working."
"Uh-huh," Hokuto hummed with an unconvinced tone. He didn't push but let his gaze fall back to the catalog.
Taiga also returned to the screen in front of him. He should have been evaluating the last set of photos properly, deciding which ones to enlarge and fit the themes they had outlined weeks ago. But his stupid mind wouldn’t let him be alone from all the confused thoughts.
He had met Kochi for lunch on Saturday. They had barely managed to make their order and sit at the table before Taiga couldn't hold his tongue. He had told Kochi everything that had happened at Hokuto's place.
-
In the end, Kochi didn't look even the slightest surprised when Taiga revealed that Hokuto had kissed him. He listened, nodding along until Taiga mumbled the embarrassing ending of the story.
"...and then I just ran away because I was a coward. The end."
Kochi blinked. Then he gaped.
"Oh my," Kochi muttered. "You did not."
Taiga wanted to sink inside his hoodie. "I did."
"You two kissed—" Kochi continued repeating Taiga's words, and Taiga felt a warm blood rising to his ears by hearing it said aloud like that. "You both liked it and then you ran away?"
"Yes, I just said that," Taiga muttered.
Kochi let out a puff. "That is incredible. And not in a good way. I mean, that's next-level dumb, even for you."
Taiga scowled. "Thanks for the support."
"I'm not here to support your terrible decision-making, I'm here to judge it when you've deserved it," Kochi said calmly. He was still looking at Taiga like he'd personally let humanity down. "Like, what was your plan there? Never see him again when you're both stuck in the same project? Fire him illegally and get the lawyers to chase you? Pretend it didn’t happen? Move to another country and forget about your exhibition?"
The more Kochi went on, the more Taiga realized it had indeed been such a stupid move.
"I don’t know, okay! I panicked, that's all. Anyway, now nothing is happening. I've ruined everything, things are weird between us and we're all stuck."
Kochi shook his head. "Well, obviously things are weird now. Because you made it weird. And now you’re waiting for him to magically fix it?"
"No… I mean, I just have no clue what’s supposed to happen next."
Kochi had given him the most unimpressed look in existence.
"Well, that depends," he said. ”What do you want to happen next?"
Taiga scowled. "That's a useless question."
"No, it's not. If you genuinely don't know, then, I kind of understand. But if you do know and you're just pretending you don't—" Kochi shrugged. "Then you're making this difficult absolutely for no reason."
Taiga groaned. "That's so unhelpful."
Kochi smirked at him. "You say that only because you don't like that I'm right. Which I am pretty often but especially now.”
Taiga didn’t say anything to that because, in his opinion, he simply didn't know. He had silenced that tiny voice in his head, which kept reminding him that maybe he knew, and that's why he kept making it overly complicated; he was just too afraid of the possible outcome.
-
Taiga was distracted from his thoughts when Hokuto shifted in his chair and pointed with his finger at a specific spot in the catalog.
"What about this entrance room?" he asked and turned the paper toward Taiga. "For the monochrome section?"
Taiga looked at the image. The space was good, and the details in his black-and-white shots would undoubtedly have been highlighted there.
"Sure," he said. "That works."
Hokuto nodded and made a note. He looked like he was about to say something else, but instead, he squeezed his lips together and returned to flipping pages.
Taiga watched him for a second too long before shaking himself out of it. He opened the next photo on the editor.
It was a photo from their last session—the one where everything had gone right, but nothing had felt right. Taiga wondered if those photos should be used after all. It wasn't like they were much different from his usual photos, but he felt something was badly missing from them.
He swallowed.
"Do you think the last photos turned out okay?" he asked carefully.
Hokuto glanced up quickly, resting his chin on his palm and looking impassive. "I haven't seen them," he commented shortly. He went back to the catalog.
"Yeah, I know, but do you think they’ll be good enough to use?"
Hokuto raised his glance again, studying him for a beat too long.
"Did you think they were bad while we were taking them?" he asked.
"No, not really," Taiga said quickly. "I just don't know if they're working since we kind of changed the plan at the last minute."
Hokuto's fingers tapped against the table again before he let out a small sigh.
"I think they're working," he said.
"Even though the whole thing wasn't planned?" Taiga pressed, but Hokuto only scoffed at that.
"Sometimes things don't go how you expect," he said, sounding a bit vexed. "But most of the time, things end up being okay. There's no need to overthink and fear for the worst beforehand."
Yeah. Kochi had said something similar.
"You're overthinking this, you know."
"I'm not."
"You like him. He likes you. It's not that complicated."
"It feels complicated."
"Only because you're making it complicated. No need to be afraid of the worst possible thing before it has happened.”
Taiga had only rolled his eyes at that.
But sitting there now, he wondered if Kochi was right.
He scrolled past another photo.
"I just don't want to look at them in the exhibition later and think this result wasn't what I wanted," he murmured.
Hokuto didn't answer right away.
"Would that be the end of the world?" he then said slowly. "Aren't things worth trying anyway?"
Taiga glanced up at him, but Hokuto looked away in the exact second, flipping the page of the catalog like they were still talking about the exhibition.
But Taiga was quite sure they weren't anymore.
All this was so frustrating. Taiga wished he dared to just ask. Ask if Hokuto had been thinking about their situation. Ask if their kiss had meant something to him. Ask if they were both just pretending it didn't happen because it was easier that way. Ask if he was angry or disappointed at Taiga for running away like a chicken just like that and that's why he kept that distance.
But it felt impossibly hard to even pick the right words to start the conversation.
Taiga clicked through the photos and didn’t say a word anymore. Hokuto, for his part, didn't push further either.
At some point, Hokuto finally closed the catalog and stood up, stretching his arms above his head before glancing around the empty hall.
"Maybe we should decide the rest before it gets too late," he said. "Kochi already ditched us and all."
Taiga agreed, nodding, closing his laptop, and standing up with him. Kochi had indeed been there earlier, walking through the venue with them and throwing out ideas in his usual easygoing way. When they had finished the tour, he had excused himself quickly, patting Hokuto's shoulder and smirking at Taiga.
"I'll see you two later. Behave nice until then."
Taiga hadn't had time to ask what that was supposed to mean before Kochi had already been on his way, heading for the door.
"Lock up when you're done," he had called over his shoulder.
-
Somehow, the quiet of the gallery made every step feel more noticeable than it should have. It also made Taiga painfully aware of how it was just the two of them. It had already felt awkward when they had been left sitting there by the table after Kochi had said his goodbyes to them - but now it was just way too notable.
They stopped inside one of the rooms. It was the smallest one in the corner, slightly complex in shape.
Taiga looked around, pondering.
"This one for the monochrome section?"
"But you agreed earlier that we would put them near the entrance," Hokuto said.
"Yeah, but having them in a more enclosed space might be better so they feel more intimate."
"You were pretty adamant about the entrance earlier."
"Well, I changed my mind."
Hokuto gave him a look that wasn't an impressed one. He looked a little bit annoyed.
"You're so indecisive."
"I'm not indecisive," Taiga puffed, feeling suddenly annoyed himself because he felt like Hokuto was seeing through him. Seeing something that even he didn't know about. "I just want it to look right."
"It's gonna be right either way, Kyomoto."
The way Hokuto said it in such a matter-of-fact way made Taiga feel somehow even more triggered.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Matsumura, I didn't realize you were the expert in photography exhibitions all of a sudden."
Hokuto scoffed. "I don't have to be an expert to see that you're overcomplicating things."
Taiga opened his mouth to fire back but then shut it again. He wasn't overcomplicating it. He just—he just wanted it to be perfect.
Hokuto took a step closer.
"You keep doing this quite often, you know,” he said quietly.
"Do what?"
"Get all worked up, think about every little detail, make a decision, then stress yourself out over it afterward."
Hokuto's voice was calm, but there was an edge to it as he continued.
"It's like you're afraid to just go with it and trust yourself."
"That's not—"
"Isn't it?" Hokuto challenged, stepping even closer until they were barely inches apart. His gaze bore into Taiga's. "You know exactly where you want those photos. You've known all along. So stop overthinking it and just do it."
Taiga was totally sure they weren't talking about the exhibition anymore.
They stared at each other.
Taiga started counting the passing seconds in his head.
One, two, three, four, fiv—
Then, Hokuto leaned in.
And Taiga did, too.
They collided, and then their mouths were on each other.
The kiss was different from the first time when it had been slow and uncertain. This time, it was rough and firm.
Taiga kissed Hokuto insistently, his hands gripping the front of his shirt, yanking him in like he had something to prove. Hokuto kissed him back and Taiga pushed him back against the wall. He bit at Hokuto's lower lip, dragging a gasp from him. Then his hands slid down, wrapping them around Hokuto's waist.
Hokuto in return clutched at Taiga's jacket like he wasn't planning to let go, kissing him back just as desperately. He tentatively pushed the tip of his tongue into Taiga's mouth and Taiga accepted it gladly.
Still, in the middle of such heated kisses, and no matter how much Taiga wanted to lose himself in the moment, there was something left to say. Something he couldn't keep swallowing down.
He pulled back just enough to whisper against Hokuto's lips.
"I like you."
Hokuto stilled, trying to calm down his heavy breathing that felt hot against Taiga's lips. Then he let out a quiet laugh, like in disbelief.
"Yeah?"
Taiga's grip on his waist tightened. "Yeah."
Hokuto brought his fingertips to brush over Taiga's cheek. His parted lips were swollen from kissing.
"Good," he murmured. "Because I like you too."
Taiga exhaled sharply. Although his head was spinning, everything suddenly felt clearer after hearing those words.
He leaned in again, kissing Hokuto’s lips, yet controlling the pace a little bit this time.
"So," Hokuto mumbled between the kisses, "what do you want to do?"
Taiga barely had a second to think before Hokuto grabbed his left wrist and guided his hand to dive under his shirt, pressing it against his bare skin. The thin skin felt soft and warm under his fingertips.
"You already know," Taiga muttered. His hand was slightly shaky as Hokuto kept guiding it to slide along his naked waist.
"Say it." Hokuto's fingers flexed against Taiga's wrist. "I want to hear it from you.”
Taiga's breath hitched.
"I want to fuck you,” he then said.
Hokuto moaned.
"Glad you finally said it aloud," he murmured. His other hand moved to Taiga's behind, just to give his buttock a firm squeeze. "You've thought about it before, haven't you?"
"You already know the answer to that."
Hokuto hummed. He let his hand go of Taiga's ass, only to bring his hand to his chest from where he dragged his fingers slowly down, stopping just above his waistband.
"Is it okay...?"
"More than okay,” Taiga answered and guided Hokuto's hand inside his pants, kissing him again.